My "Real" Motivation...

One of the main reasons I am trying to get my weight down is pregnancy.  Sure, I want to be healthy... I want to look good for my husband...I want to feel comfortable about my body...I want self confidence... But, my driving force is a potential pregnancy.

My husband and I are going to start trying for kids after Christmas... We've been married for a year and a half.  I know some would still consider us "newlyweds" and advise us to enjoy time to ourselves, but we are ready.  We both talk about being parents constantly... Being a mom is all I think about.  Plus, we want 2-3 children and I'm going to be 29 this year (he will be 32) and we don't want to be having kids too late in life.

First of all, I want a healthy pregnancy and know that weight can cause issues.  Second of all, I want to look pregnant...not just fat.  I've always been afraid that when I get pregnant people won't be able to tell if I'm really pregnant or just overweight.

My goal weight is 147lbs... I have roughly 50ish pounds to go.  I know that I can get this off before Christmas, but it's just starting to hit me how close Christmas really is! 

This is my motivation.  I think this weekend made me realize that I need to step up my game and get this weight OFF. I mean, it's already the middle of August...What happened to July!?  Before I know it, it's going to be Thanksgiving....and then Christmas.

I've been lolly-gaggin' for the last month.  I haven't lost what I've wanted... I think it's mostly because I've gotten comfortable.  I feel good about the 50lbs I've already lost.... and have slacked off.  I'm in a "halfway hump"...I just need to keep reminding myself of my goal and that even though I "feel good"...I'm still overweight!

I am ready to get back with it.  This "halfway hump" has got to go!!!

Until next time...

I'm big boned...Oh wait, I'm just fat!

My mother has always told me I am "big boned"... I've heard that a lot my life and believed it. I've always used that as an excuse in my head for being a bigger girl.

One thing that I've learned... I'm NOT "big boned"... I'm fat. I'm not ashamed to say this because I am accepting what I have done to my body and working on correcting my mistakes.

I've never had an ultimate "goal weight" to reach... My reasoning for this was always because I'd look at the healthy weight range charts and see 120-160ishlbs was my range. (I'm 5'6"). I've always assumed if I get to 160lbs that I will look like an emaciated supermodel because I'm "big boned"... Plus, I can't remember the last time I weighed less that 175ish so to get into that "Healthy Range" seems near impossible at times.

Well, I asked my Doctor what should be my goal weight... Her answer: 140lbs. I'm sure she noticed my eye roll when that number came out of her mouth. I immediately asked her why it was so low b/c I'm bigger boned... Needless to say, I am "medium build" (average size) underneath all this fat. NOT big boned.

So... With this being said, I've created my own personal goal. I want to get down to 147lbs. Why 147? Well, I started my journey at 247lbs (my highest weight)... so I may as well shoot for 100lbs. I think if I can stay under 150lbs and maintain it I will be happy.

***My weigh in is tomorrow (the one that I actually count), but I get on the scale EVERY morning. I am happy to say that I weighed in this morning at 199lbs!!!! Finally out of the 200's!

Until next time...